The world hates you

Disclaimer : The opinions expressed in the blog are purely author's personal opinion, so kindly Don't treat them as Govt's latest policy and start criticizing it.

Some time back i received a joke on whatsapp, which goes like this :

Teacher : Children,  the world is round.
 Jack : But Ma'am my dad says the world is MOTHER FU**ER.


That one message summaries a plethora of books, and wise sayings and biographies. Just look around you , you will see that everywhere , everyone is trying to do you over, be it your boss, your colleagues, your associates and even your relatives. People since childhood have an expectation from themselves that they will be king some day but they forget that there is only one king and rest are all subjects, but they don't find solace in that fact. Once they realize that they can't be king, they then start struggling for being at least a lord, again the fact is that lords are still very few in number, then they try to become at least a local leader, still if they fail in that they try and become the Whip holder of the household, with an illusion of control in their head and trying to assert themselves on everyone around them , without realizing that they are simply spreading hate and anguish around themselves, esp among the only few people who will genuinely come forward to help them if so they ask or need.

Yes , i don't expect that the world be full of  Florence Nightingale's, or Mother Teresa', but at least people can mind their own business. Yes if my doing something is affecting you in a way that its making YOU uncomfortable - not your morality or beliefs or opinions- then you must interfere and convey your displeasure, but life is not so simple. We immediately start hypothesizing that this will lead to this and then that would lead to that and in a hundred years so much damage will be done and etc etc. Average human life expectancy is around 74 years, out of that after 50 you are busy trying not to die than to live. Diseases start creeping on, body starts failing you, there's not much that you can do which you really enjoy, and the first 20 years of your life you are busy trying to reach somewhere so that you can be independent from your parents and do what you really want to do. so by the time you get a job and feel that you can take decisions you are 25. For a brief time of 25 years you have the ability and resources to fulfill your desires, do you really want to loose these 25 years? and those who keep interfering with lines of people around them with their hallowed opinions about success and failure do you really want to steal away these 25 years from someone that you really care about? If you really care about someone, you should help them , and not pass judgment or opinion.

People around you are bothered about you in only a few scenarios, One if they expect from you that you will give them something, Or if you can give them something in near or far future, Or if they expect that they can take something from you . The moment that all the above three scenarios become invalid, people will stop asking even if you are alive or dead. So don't worry about the world, worry about the few people in the world who touch your life in a way everyday. You can't make anyone happy if you are not happy yourself, a kid who wanna be a singer, but becomes a doctor because it was expected from him, might make himself useful to a lot of people but he isn't happy from the inside, let him be a singer, there will be enough doctors in the world. God made us humans as a blessing, don't discard this blessing by living life like a cow - tied to a post, so people can milk-, or a sheep - following the shepherd blindly-, be a human and live like one, be independent in thinking and break free, because we need thinkers more than we need followers.


Remember that no matter what you will do, you will always be a threat to a greedy someone, or a failure someone who thinks that you are eating up his share of food, drinking his share of water, and breathing his share of air. Don't let that selfish person dictate your thoughts and never be that person yourself.

ONE MAN'S BREAD IS OTHER MAN'S POISON

THE WORLD HATES YOU

Lansdowne!!!!!!

And we started off on our roadtrip.

Me and ma bitches. Ashy, G, Mukulesh, Muthuraja, saurav and professor. We started just a bit behind schedule. We were supposed to laeve at 5 then G said that he wont be able to reach that early, so the plan shifted to 530, and then G got stuck in jam at 5 in the mornin!!!!! So finally we rolled at 6. Then karizma went dry, so me and G waited ahead and muthu and saurav got petrol. Then we rolld again, soon mukulesh caught up with his camera frenzy and furiously clicke daway the pics. Then we remembered that ok, journey is more important than destination, but kamino, rasta toh pata karo!!! Luckily I had noted down frm net, the major towns in between. So we rolled on. Then while me and muthu were waiting fr others to follow up as we had to take a turn muthu said ki arey koi gir gaya hai, I said ok. Then he said casually shayad saurabh gir gaya hai, and holy shhit he and G had actually fallen!!! But not much damage done!!! Then we rolled on. Feeling hungry, we stopped by a canal where saurav received that his grandma is admitted in ICU. Well we wished him best of luck , and thus we were one man down. We dropped him at nearest bus terminal, after having break fast. Then we rolled on , the road was awesome I tell u, all green fields wide double lane road lined by trees on both sides. So we rolled on and on, and reached the snaky mountains, where we learned that there are elephants in these areas, so we thought of sticking to the road and not trek around doing BC. Then we suddenly felt like having a cold water dip and thus plunged in the river that was running there. After that we had BHUTTA ek ke baad ek like jaanwars. Continued along with a stoppage every now and then to satisfy mukulesh's animal urges to click pics. As we snaked along the mountain it was getting calmer and cooler, it was amazing I tell u. with juz 300 km of awesome bike drive if such a leasently place can be reached then I can go there every weekend. Finally we reached lansdowne.Found ourselves a hotel, laid there fr half an hour and then sight seing. There was a war memorial and a war museum. The memorial was out of bounds, thuis we feasted our eyes on the museum. Then we went to bhulla lake, which was not exactly a lake, and was more of a pond. Which was built by fauji's by building a dam at one end of the stream and thus trapping the water. Then we moved to a view point called tip and top. It was an amazing view from there.

Then went back to room. And next day left fr noida. Untill we reached kotdwar it was just roll down with engine off. Me and G were rolling in front while rest two bikes had taken a wrong turn and were lost. Then we found a stream which had a narrow rasta leading to it so we parked at its banks and went down fr a swim. Then after a few hours we again rolled. Sopped at jain shikanji at modinagar, which was a disappointmnt. Anyway me, mukul and muthuraja reahed spice and were waiting fr g and proff, then they called up saying they been banged, I mean they got screwd. He he.

All in all saurav and anup went down and G went down twice.

AND THAT’S HOW WE ROLL.

Tick Tock

Have u ever realised how we yearn for summers , during winters and for winters during summers!!!

or like we waited fr the training all this time and now when we have the training going on we just can't wait to get back to college. Hana?

I know..... life is cruel, but hey that's why god made all these angels.

To help those in distress, so let me be your angel for tonight and let's fight this devil of boredom together. Try this stuff and pray that u dont die of boredom:

#1.  Hold yr breath and see how long u can hold it. Compare with yourself and try beat your record.

#2 Look at the ppl going around u, and mentally reject every person , that why cant he\she be your BF\GF. like, "too fat", "too slim", "too beautiful" ;) ...... etc etc.

#3 Crack your knuckles, while giving dirty look to the most sookha hua person u can see, and try to scare him as if he whistled at yr gal , and you just wanna beat the shit out of him!!!

#4 Being a true Indian, turn to any person you see and start discussing about cricket. and if he still don't seem to be interested, then start discussing how india kicked pakistani ass in some match, if he still doesn't respond then drop it, he is DEAF!!!

#5 Paint your nails and wipe them off, do it again, but dont let yr sister see you.

#6 Browse through your phonebook and try and recall the last time you called that friend, and if you think he\she is useless explain to yourself that it's good you haven't talked to them.

You think you got better ideas than me? Lets see what you got. Add your ideas to the comments.

Agra ka raasta kya hai?

The greatest moments happen just by chance, they say!!  And i can vouch for that. 

After all the planning and making and breaking schedules, i finally got my road trip, and that also at the moment when i had least expected it. 

It so happened that me and Ankur were coming back after getting his car's AC repaired, while we were somewhere near Apollo hospital, 

he asked ki  " Yaar lajpat nagar ka rasta kahan se hoga?"  

And with my poor sense of directions 

I said ki " Bhai agra ka rasta toh saamney se hai,  woh dekh sign board par likha hai", 

He said ki " Chal phir agra hi chaltey hain." 

Phir kya tha, we went his home packed up an extra shirt , packed his digicam went to my place took the phone chargers, lens solution, bike keys, my helmet and off we went. 

Just then somewhere half an hour on the road later something lit up in our head, the big question......"AGRA KA RAASTA KYA HAI?" .

Then frantically i tried to check my phonebook to see if there was any one i knew who might have a faintest idea that where the hell agra is - Yes, GPS was not an option those days. 

After a few futile attempts, I desperately thought ki Taj Mahal ke paas se Yamuna behti hai na? lets follow yamuna and we will definitely reach there, and that too directly Taj Mahal, but then i shot it down myself when i recalled that we have to return by next day as ankur had his office. 

Then it struck me that Saket had gone to Agra this valentines and luckily he picked up the phone also, - unlike kitty asshole, who had his cell switched off for two days. 

Anyway I called him up and got the directions, after that it was we and the road, kabhie woh aagey, kabhie hum pichey bus full speed chaley jaa rahey they. 

After around 30 Km we stopped to stock on water, snacks and .....misc items :wink: .

We had started at 9:40 PM. than again the race against flying Tudi - rice husk- started.

That time being harvesting season ,trolley loaded with rice husk was plying on roads overloaded and spreading them around, mostly in our eyes.

 The bike was fuelled till the brim, literally. After 100 km or so we stopped For dinner at around 1145 at a family dhaba and had dinner. 

Our helmet ke visors were very scratched and unki totally lagi padi thi so had to drive with open visor whenever a vehicle would shine its headlight hence our eyes were more red than white.

 We saw the Mathura Crude oil refinery and also the burning gas tower from where exhaust gases come out, it was good and very bright ; Actually whole of the road was lit up with it, and mind you,  it was kinda far off. 

Finally reached agra at 0130 and managed to reach someplace called Bijli ghar and got into a hotel. Slept like a log, the cooler was damn cool yaar.  

By the time my neend was disturbed at 7 in morning one of my hands had frozen and had to be cut off 😅, but i  somehow did not lose hope and it regained consciousness, but after that i became cautious and took the blanket over me. 

Then next day got up and went to see the Taj Mahal at 1000 . It was just walking distance from where I was staying and I did'nt even realise till I reach there. 

It was good as the layout was very good, the entrances, the courtyard etc etc. It was freakingly hot -the weather- and we were feeling like dropping dead then and there next to mumtaaz 😁. the ASI has ajeeb funda there, you can take the still cameras but no video recorders.                 Fuckkers!!! 

Anyway our digicam looked like a video recorder to them and they refused to accept that it took still images also. Illiterate Ignorant assholes. Like if I made a video recording then mumtaaz will loose her honor 🙈 in her grave. 

But chalo we both had camera phones, so fuck the fukin fuckers. We had a round of the place and soon got bored because of the exceptionally bright sun we weren't able to look directly at any part of glaring white marble of Taj Mahal. 

Came back to the room and then asked the manager to guide us to some fun thing in that dead city, or the city known for the deads. He said yeah yeah theres is a big market for leather shoes , we were not in mood for lunch so we asked what else? he said there is a big market, we said ok cool!!!

When we reached there we were utterly disappointed. The way he said ki BIG market sadar bazaar, we were impressed then and there only but it turned out to be just a bunch of shops.

 Arey ussey bada market toh mere sector mein hai, and i dont go there as it's too small to visit. ha ha.
Saaley Agra ke pagal.

Managed to find a restaurant for lunch, and it was quite impressive!! With AC and all Bamboo walls, Good! 

Had lunch and it was feeling so nice and cool that sat there for around 3 hours. Then left for noida and tried to cover as much as possible in daylight other wise our eyes would again get screwed, and with the lenses it would be one heck of a headache to take em off again and again and wash. 

So full throttle karizma zoomed past everyone!!! Even some Mercs, but one swift wala dude gave a real good fight, with all that horse power he surely out -strengthened us but I outmaneuvered him. he he Sucker. 

Don't mess with roadies on road.

Finally reached home and now giving my ass some rest. I bet tomorrow even my shit would come in granules coz of all the vibration from the bike ride!! He he.

By the way if u really are interestyed to know if i had shit granular form then ask me in comments and i'll clear the mystery!!!!

GODSPEED

"Hor Batao"

Have you ever been on a long chat with someone on phone or messenger or anywhere where it's free or you have those Airtel to Airtel minutes? Then i can bet that the most frequently and annoying thing you will hear them say is " Hor Batao" English translation being "What else, or whats up?".

I mean what the heck yaar , Hor kya bataoon?

Meri chaddian gandi padi hai, kaise dhoun yeh bataoon?

Ya bathroom mein paani ki naali choke ho gaya hai yeh bataoon?

Hamesha main hi kyun batoon?

Kabhi khud bhi batao yaar, kya sab kuch mere saath hi hota hai?

Ya meri life public property hai ke main bas batata hi rahoon?

Well when I talk to someone and they say "Hor Batao" then there are a lot many things which I interpret from it:

1: They think that they have the right to pass their time with me at my expense.

I mean if you call up, then you must have had something in mind na? Just to pass time, or to share something or to discuss something.

But once u start saying "Hor Batao" more than 3 times, it means that whatever purpose that you wanted to serve from this interaction has either been achieved or that you have lost hope that it will be achieved, then u keep on saying "Hor Batao, Hor Batao" so that it should be me who would say good bye and then you can be the person who will someday complain to me that "You don't want to talk to me  anymore".

2: They are more keen to just sit back and "Hmmm" and absent minded nod their head while I tap away at my keyboard like some crazy dickhead.

It sometimes annoys me that I'm typing away at my keyboard trying to have a healthy two way conversation and all i get from other side is  "hhhmmmm"  and the dreaded  "yeah". I mean come on yaar I'm not used to typing. I had used pen and paper for the better part of my school  life so if u don't even appreciate my effort then say catch u later or anything, but please don't do this.

3: They really don't wanna get into a conversation

Sometimes a person might be getting bored and would say "Hi" or call up just to avoid dozing off, but soon it happens that they are texted by someone else or remember that you have to do something better with your time and then you think what the fish am i doing with this looser;  So you start saying "Hor Batao" and "Hor Batao".

The other person out of courtesy keeps on saying things and tries to keep the conversation alive but as they say gareeb and shareef  hamesha dabtey hain.

But on the other side it also might mean that the other person is feeling lonely and wants to just hear someone speak, and they chose you because your voice or words bring them comfort.

Well it angers me when I hear "Hor Batao" for more than two times, but when you think of it like this, that the other person chose you of all the world to spend time with, then It just makes me smile - from the inside.

Firestarter

The day i'm writing my first blog. I really don't know what to do with this blog thing yaar.

I mean if I'm supposed to write whatever I want to write, then why would I give the link to everyone? I know that this blogging is not anonymous and everyone that i know can and will read it, then why would I be honest with my writing ?

Hana?

I will only write the things that are socially correct and accepted so as not to offend anyone.

So whats the fun of writing it? I can't understand, but even then let's see what it turns out to be and maybe I'll understand that why do people write in these blogs and are ready to start a fight!!!